Piper
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Piper

My name is Piper Bivens! I was born on November 16, 1998 in Kingston, Ontario. By looking at my pictures, I'm sure you can tell that I'm a Bouvier des Flanders. I was registered as being black but I look more gray brindle like my  adopted brother Typhoon.

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    Of course, I'm a little girl and I love all things frilly. I especially love sleeping on my mommy's pretty pillows. I love to go for walks. My parents take me into the woods where they let me run free! As soon as I'm let loose, I just have to ruuuunnnnnn. I go as fast as I can, then I turn around and run back to my family. Some day, this bullet speed that I have developed will come in very handy I'm sure. We walk  to a lake where the water is the best for swimming. It's so refreshing. I wash off my face every time too. Boy, does that feel good! Little girls have to look good all the time! In the summer, I love to eat blueberries right off the bush! Yummy!

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There you can see my brother, Typhoon, and my deceased sister, Sheba. When Typhoon starts to play rough with my Mommy, I punch him in the butt to distract him and then run in between him and my Mommy to protect her. There's no need for such rough playing.

2003 - Daddy - Once I heard that Mommy wasn't buying you any presents this year, I decided that since you're the best darn Daddy a doggie ever had (Typhoon confirmed this) you deserve lots of presents for Christmas. What was Mommy thinking? So I called up TLC (The Learning Channel) and convinced them to embark upon a new reality TV series that I aptly named 'Doggies Working For Christmas Cash". They gave me still shots of all the video they took for the show over the last few weeks and this "Doggie Christmas Cash Album" cleverly presents all of the jobs I had to hold to make sure that your hands wouldn't be empty on Christmas Eve. I'm smarter than your average blondie doggie after all. Eh? - signed, Piper

Dishwasher

My antibacterial slobber always cuts the grease! The crumbs aren't half bad either!

Cook

Cooling was fun....I got to lick up after! Try a bun. Or...some crumbs!

Maid

I've gotta think of a better job.....$%@&* spilt some!

Wait till Dad finds out Liz is paying me to dust!

Personal Trainer

Come on Liz! 5 more....4 more...3more...kick those heels baby, you're not tired yet!

You're doing it all wrong! Let's flatten that tummy, Liz!! I'll show you how....learn from a pro.

Sales

Shhh! She's still exercising, now I can get on Ebay and make some cash selling these stupid toys. Eh?

Carpenter's Aide

J.C. offered me a couple of bucks to help out with the door.....but he's gone out for another smoke.

Hairdresser

Got any gossip on Liz? I've been moonlighting as her personal trainer. By the way, do you want me to add some highlights to this mess? Oh, and how well do you tip?

Santa

Ho, ho, ho! What do you want for Christmas little doggie? ...Oh, by the way, how much do you tip?

Busker

Typhoon could howl but no one knew about my talents as a dulcimer player.      "Folks, gather round! Tap your feet. A 1 and a 2 and a 1, 2, 3, 4!"  "Wait, wait, don't leave!! I know TubaBoy! PERSONALLY! Ya, you like that dontchya? Keep those coins coming."

Yard Work

My work never ends....cleaning cars is a bitch.

Hooker

Smooch, smooch. Come a little closer, sugar! Don't mind the stuffing, I'm all woman. More than you can handle for the low price of $40/hr.

Come back! Alright then, I'll take my panties off.....I never liked this wedgie anyway!! Where's my tip???

More Yard work

Here comes another car... "HEY! I DO DRIVEWAYS! CHEAP! REAL CHEAP!"

Transient

Hey Buddy....can you spare a dime?

DONE!

Finally made enough $ to make Daddy happy. Phewf!

 

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11/20/2005